Angel Mothers

Believe it or not, many women hate Mother's Day.

Women who would like to be mothers but have not yet that the opportunity feel excluded. Women who have lost a child find it a very emotionally trying day.

And even the women who have all of their children alive and well can begin to hate mother's day. I have heard some women express that they hate hearing about all of the perfect mothers in the world. It makes them feel even more inadequate in comparison.

But let's face it. Nobody's mother is perfectly angelic. We all fall short of the mark from time to time. Or more often than that.

Below is the post I wrote about my own mother in honor of the holiday:

"Happy Mother's Day!! I am sitting here tonight thinking about my own mother. She is the epitome of optimism. If something bad happens she works overtime to find the silver lining. She is almost always happy, smiliing. She's intensely interested in other people, even someone she just met. I never wonder whether she will want to help me out of a bind or whether she will be interested in my latest news-- she always makes me feel important. Growing up she filled our home with good books, beautiful music, and delicious food. I am proud to have her as my mother."

 

Doesn't she sound perfect?

 

What I didn't say about my mom is that she was always misplacing things. The cordless phone would be missing and we'd find it in the dishwasher (thankfully before it was washed) or the refrigerator or some such place. She was forgetful. She would forget to pick kids up from school or forget to sign permission slips (for heaven's sake, the poor woman had six children and a husband who had to work a lot). She lost her temper sometimes and yelled at her kids. Her house wasn't always clean and her life wasn't always organized. She didn't feed us organic foods. Maybe we ate too much white bread and not enough leafy green vegetables. She had no idea how to style my crazy, frizzy curls and sometimes she made the mistake of letting the hairstylist turn me into little orphan Annie.

 

BUT what you should also know is that when my mom realized she left the phone in the dishwasher she would always willingly have a good laugh at her mistake. By watching my mom I LEARNED TO BE ABLE TO LAUGH AT MYSELF (which is good, since I have plenty of material).

 

When my mom forgot things she ought to have remembered she didn't get bent out of shape. She just apologized and moved on. From my mom I LEARNED TO NOT SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF.

 

When my mom made the mistake of yelling at one of her children she apologized and made sure we felt loved. She taught me to be willing to apologize when I was wrong and to NEVER GO TO BED MAD.

 

The fact that my mom's house wasn't always clean or her life perfectly organized was the result of my mom having greater priorities. She showed me that it's more important to GIVE YOUR CHILDREN YOUR TIME AND ATTENTION than it is to give your house your time and attention.

 

 Although my mom let me eat too much white bread and not enough organic produce, at least she fed us white bread she baked herself and cookies and treats she prepared for us with her own hands. From my mom I learned A LOVE FOR BAKING (I do wish she could have instilled in me a love for washing up the dishes afterwards, but, alas, she had no luck there).  

 

My mom couldn't get my hair just right and she didn't buy me the latest fashions. She didn't worry about those things. She didn't leave her children looking unkempt, but she also taught me that my APPEARANCE WAS LESS IMPORTANT THAN WHAT WAS ON THE INSIDE. She wanted her children to be kind and good.

 

I'm glad to know my mom isn't perfect. Her imperfections are part of who she is. And we mothers all ought to embrace our inadequacies because through them our children will learn how to face their own shortcomings in life. Dear moms of the world, love yourselves, all of yourselves, as much as you love your dear children. Embrace Mother's Day as a chance to focus on the things you're good at instead of your weak areas. After all, you're just doing the best you can with the gifts you've been given.

 

Happy Mother's Day!