Religious Myths Revealed

Thanks to Mormon Presidential candidate Mitt Romney, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is all over the media these days. As a Mormon, I often feel the need to correct some of the misconceptions out there about our church & its members. Just as not all Muslims are jihadists, not all Mormons fit the stereotypes assigned us by ill-informed people.

Myth #1: All of our women are exceptionally beautiful.
Truth: Though many of the Mormon women are very beautiful, we have our share of less-attractive women. No more or less than other religious groups.

Myth #2: Our congregations are spilling over with raging alcoholics.
Truth: Though I'm sure we have a few closet alcoholics amongst us, practicing Mormons do not drink alcohol. I have never tasted the stuff myself. I choose to get drunk, instead, on power.

Myth #3: We have unusually small families.
Truth: This may come as a surprise, but we actually tend to have larger than average families. My parents, for example, raised 6 children.

Myth #4: We hate the Jehovah's Witnesses.
Truth: We actually really like them because they take part of the brunt of door-to-door proselytizing jokes. Takes a little heat off us.

Myth #5: We don't really think about or plan for the the future.
Truth: Actually, we tend to be a little overprepared for the future. We keep lots of food & other supplies in our basements for emergencies, like when you forgot to buy sugar at the grocery store. Or other, real, emergencies, like natural disasters.

Myth #6: We only go to church on Easter & Christmas.
Truth: This is a common misconception. In reality, we spend 3 hours in church every Sunday. Really. And, for the most part, we enjoy it. Crazy people.

Myth #7: Mormons are crazy.
Truth: This might actually be kind of true, such as in the case of... me, for example. But it certainly doesn't apply to everyone, so it's not fair to apply it generally.

Myth #8: We hate jello.
Truth: On the contrary, Mormons consume an unusually large amount of jello per capita as compared to the amounts consumed by the general population . It's yummy.

Myth #9: Mormons have potty mouths.
Truth: Though this is widely believed, Mormons, in general, try not to use offensive language. Instead, we make up our own words which, though not offensive, may be annoying to some.

Myth #10: The Mormon Church (more correctly and longly called The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints) receives heavy support from the Big Tobacco.
Truth: Actually, the tobacco companies do not like Mormons. We do not smoke and with our proselytizing efforts worldwide we are taking business away from them.



I hope I have helped clear things up for some of you.